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Oh, Mother’s Day…

Mother’s Day, like all holidays, can bring a mixture of emotions. While we all technically have a mother, what happens after birth varies greatly. I had no idea how challenging Mother’s Day could be until my mom died because most of my life it was just a day where our family did something nice for our mom. Since her death and after working with many ...

Birth-day

It’s that time of year again. It’s my birthday. This Thursday, the 4th of May, marks the anniversary of the day I came into this world. Now that I am a mom, birth-day has a whole new meaning. ​​​​​​ While I am so grateful for my life and so grateful to be alive, I don’t love my birthday. What’s interesting to me is that the birth-day itself ...

Why Graduates Need Compassion…

Do you know that seemingly positive milestones can be a painful grieving experience? Seeing that the school year is coming to a close, today we are going to look at graduation. If you are a parent of a highschool, college, or any other school graduate, or you are graduating yourself, please know this: Graduation is a grieving experience because grief is, “the conflicting feelings that ...

What to Say When Someone is Sad…

As we chatted with our daughter Ayla on FaceTime, it was clear that her little heart was hurting to be away from her mommy and daddy. For our 10 year anniversary, Aaron and I decided to go on a little trip to celebrate. This is the first time, since our daughter was born almost two and a half years ago, that we have both been ...

Is Your “I’m Fine,” a Lie?

Do you know why people are afraid to ask, “How are you?” It’s because if the answer is anything but “fine” or “good”, they are not sure what they will say or do.   That’s why people who have broken hearts are constantly lying saying, “I’m fine.” We (I will include myself here) don’t want to burden others with our sadness, pain, or bad day. ...

Feeling Absence on Valentine’s Day?

Ohhh love… How is it that love is the most beautiful and most painful experience of life? When we have love, feel love, experience love, it is life giving. When we lose love, it is devastating. Today is Valentine’s Day, a day that commercially represents love. ​​​​​​​And as beautiful is that day is for some, it can be incredibly painful for others. Whether you have experienced ...

Your Loss is Enough

“You alone are enough. You have nothing to prove to anybody.” -Maya Angelou So often I hear people say things like, “I went through a terrible divorce, but hers is worse because her husband died.” Or someone says, “I only lost my job, but I can’t feel bad because there are people out there who are starving.” ​While appreciating someone else’s challenge or grief experience can bring perspective to ...

The Pitfall of Planning and What to Do Instead…

As we approach the New Year there is a tendency toward reflection and planning. Where do you spend most of your time? In the past — in regret or fond memories. In the future — in worry or excited anticipation. As I step back and notice my own thoughts, I realize more and more how much time I spend worrying about a future that may ...

It Doesn’t Take Time, It Takes…

“Change happens when the pain of staying the same is greater than the pain of change.” -Tony Robbins About 9 months after my mom died, I just couldn’t keep pretending I was fine anymore. I wasn’t fine. And it was too painful and lonely to stay where I was. ​There was this internal shift where I decided that nothing was too weird to try if ...